My daughter is nineteen, very overweight, and struggling with her
inability to stop eating or diet, whatever to lose her excesive weight,
and fitting in with her peers who are the ideal media weight, and fit
into the most recent styles. She wants to be like everyone else and my
heart goes out to her. I watch as she buys cloths that fit a skinnier
girl, and although she'll get the cloths big enough for her, they don't
look right on her because they were meant for small, slimmer girls, and
all those styles do on heavy girls is define their weight. My daughter
wants to look like everyone of her girls friends and thinks she must be
able to identify with them by buying the cloths that they buy. Her
weight problem probably goes deeper than merely styles of clothing, but
this is an issue I've been made aware of recently.

I'm afraid to say anything to her at this point. Yet, I'm her father,
and if I can't talk to her about, I know damn well the world won't.
I'm afraid some assinine person out there in the world is going to
humiliate her in public about her tight clothes or clothes that do more
to enhance her weight problem than make her more able to fit in. I
want to help her.

Right now I'm spending much time trying to figure out a tackful way to
tell or show her that because of her weight she'd be better off wearing
clothing that hung well on her rather than a style that was made to
look tight to enhance bones, hips, and define what soceity has been led
to believe is beauty. I'm not downing any of our ideas of what's
beautiful or looking to justify being over-weight. I am trying to
protect my dauther from an insensitive world of ignorant, selfish,
individuals who make themselves look good by putting the next person
down and are very insentive, lacking sympathy, and realizing the
ramification that humiliating a young person can do to them. I love my
daughter and just want her to be happy. Positive reenforcement would
go much father in helping this world than any humiliation.

Anyway, the purpose of this post is to get some advice on styles of
spring/summer clothing for a young girl. I hoping to buy something,
and outfit for her that she'll where, but it isn't necessarily the
common style, but maybe something that'll look good to her friend, is a
piece or set of clothing that is made for heavy girls--i.e. hanging,
free-flowing, etc.

Any advice on a mother and father helping an over-weight dauther with
peer pressure, identification crisis, and the particular issue of
fitting in by looking like your peers, but most of your peers are
slender, and you're not, please advice.

In advance, thank from a loving father.

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